Narrative Therapy Consultation I

I just had a consultation session with my course tutor, Sue Mitchell, in Australia and had to put this down for my own record.

I appreciate the "absent but implicit" in my work but find myself fumbling to uncover more of it for my clients. What I learned is that the presence of significant others in the session can distract me from being curious, from asking more about the importance of the absent but implicit.  In a mother and son session, the mum's complaints about the son distracted me into trying to defend the boy.  What might be helpful for me is to set the context for them so that the mum becomes an audience to the son's telling.

In terms of the practice of Outsider Witness Group (OWG), I thought I knew the differences between this and the traditional forms of reflecting.  The challenge for me was finding the right time to use it.  However, one fine distinction escaped my notice.  This difference was not in the therapy room itself but occured outside of it.  The traditional practice of reflecting was used to help "unstuck" a therapist, so when Sue was explaining that OWG is used to help strengthen and develop the evolving preferred story and to keep it alive, it dawned on me that it was not about timing the use of OWG but that I had unknowingly positioned it as an "unstucking" practice.  I'm now more aware of other counselling discourses that permeate my clinical practice and am more prepared to navigate my practice through the uneven terrains ahead.

In the conversations with Sue, she also supported me in finding out what I hope for my clients.  I hope that clients can be liberated from judgement, this judgement can be self-judgement or judgement by others.

Re-authoring Conversations

I am doing a series of reflections as part of a post graduate course on Narrative Therapy.  Overall there will be about ten reflection papers on various concepts and practices that currently form and shape Narrative Therapy.

This is my first encounter with re-authoring in a collective manner used as a means of achieving unity in diversity (Denborough, 2008).  I began to wonder how such a collective approach could be used in group work with a diverse group of youths who come from the same school but from different classes.  Thus their age, gender, ethnicity, education level, and family backgrounds are highly diverse.  These youths were referred due to the possible risk of early school leaving. 

One of the common themes that these youths experience is negative peer influence and reading the article opened up a possible approach for tracing the history of this peer influence in their lives.  Some of these youths wish to resist peer influence but seem to have only vague ideas.   Based on the use of collective timelines done by Alfonso Diaz-Smith (Denborough, 2008), I formed some of these draft questions that could be asked to facilitate a re-authoring process.  During the process of drawing out these timelines, I hope to uncover the vagueness to reveal a richer story around resisting negative peer influence.

Resisting Negative Peer Influence

·        When did you realize Negative Peer Influence can create trouble for you?

·        Who saw that Negative Peer Influence was creating trouble for you?

·        How did it affect the people who see you in trouble?

·        When did you start thinking about resisting Negative Peer Influence?

·        Why would you want to resist Negative Peer Influence?

·        Who would support you in resisting Negative Peer Influence?

·        How have such people supported you? And why would they support you?

·        What does all this say about you, your values or beliefs?

·        When did you try resisting Negative Peer Influence?

·        What have you tried and what are some ways you may want to try?

·        What would you do differently after hearing everyone’s stories?

I like the idea that a collective effort has the potential to dissolve some of the barriers between these youths through a shared sense of purpose.  Most of the times these youths may feel isolated, especially boys who are brought up in a culture where they are expected to act tough and handle their own problems.  When they try to tackle problems on their own it can lead to a sense of despair and thus they succumb to peer pressure. 

Youths are at an age where identity development usually takes place, and a collective timeline project is another avenue for socially constructing such identities.  There are possibilities for re-membering and outsider-witness group practices to further strengthen the plot (Carey & Russell, 2003).

References

Carey, M., & Russell, S. (2003). Re-Authoring: Some answers to commonly asked questions. The International Journal of Narrative Therapy and Community Work(3), pp 19-43.

Denborough, D. (2008). Chapter 7: Collective narrative timelines and maps of history. In Collective Narrative Practice: Responding to individuals, groups and communities who have experienced trauma.

Instrument metaphor

I find the metaphor of a musical instrument an apt one for the role that counselling plays in a client's life.  I can be like a master craftsman that produces a variety of instruments, helps clients to choose one that fits their preference, and assist them to calibrate the instruments.

What they need to do is put in the hours of practice, develop their style, and put up a good performance.  They may learn to play from people they admire or from friends and other sources. I become a backstage audience that takes pride knowing the instrument I made has supported the success of the musician.  As I make more instruments I can further improve my craft to help other musicians.

Where there is hatred let me bring love
Where there is doubt let me bring faith
Where there is falsehood let me bring truth
Where there is pain I'll comfort you

Where there is silence let me sing praise
Where there's despair let me bring hope
Where there is blindness let me bring sight
Where there is darkness let me bring light

And with these words I speak
Grant that I may not seek to be heard but to hear
To be consoled but to console
Not to be seen but to see, to be loved but to love

For when we give love we will receive
When we forgive love we'll find reprieve
It is in dying we'll be released
Make me an instrument of peace, of peace, of peace

Re-membering practices

I am doing a series of reflections as part of a post graduate course on Narrative Therapy.  Overall there will be about ten reflection papers on various concepts and practices that currently form and shape Narrative Therapy.

Re-membering Practices

Reading the article on common questions about re-membering moved me to consider who might have contributed to my own journey in becoming a counsellor, especially the skills, knowledges, and values that I currently have (Russell & Carey, 2002).  Initially I thought of a few persons that might have been significant but realized that there was a long list of people, books, and even films and songs that contributed in their own way to my life.  In the past I might have termed these as “subconscious” influences or even downplayed them.  I imagine if I told someone Superman was some one I admired, this idea may easily be diminished or overlooked.

I have found re-membering helpful when working with children because they often have a favourite cartoon or comic book character that can lead to a revelation of what they value.  Often I hear colleagues, who are youth workers, say they “chit chat” with youths based on common interests.  I feel it would be more influential if such common interests were traced to certain skills or knowledges that could be further explored in a re-membering conversation.

I have faced situations where a client does not link any persons through re-membering and the advice on “do not race ahead of the person concerned” is a good reminder for me not to be carried away whenever potentially significant figures appear in their story.  Sometimes I face a dilemma in deciding which plots or themes to explore and the reading has helped lay down two basic criteria: i) the chosen theme should help reduce a sense of isolation, and ii) the chosen theme should contribute to building a richer alternative story.

Grief and Loss

The writing on the Women and Grief Project reflected a similar situation I encountered in one client (Dulwich Centre, 2008).  She is an Indian mother whose husband died a few years ago and ever since then she was very concerned over her young daughter whom she believed to be deeply affected by the loss.  When I asked about her own grief she finally poured out about the bad memories she had of relatives who handled the funeral rites in a way that she disapproved of.  She had kept her stories bottled up for a long time without an audience.   I imagine a similar programme to the Women and Grief Project could have been helpful for her and other women who feel subjugated in their culture.

She also mentioned being by her husband’s side in the hospital and telling him to let go as she promised to look after the children.  In his unconscious state, he shed a tear before departing.  She did not spend time grieving and started working long hours since then.  Looking back, it might have been greatly healing to interview her in re-membering her husband.

Legacy

In thinking about legacy I am reminded about how I could be re-membered by those whom I know personally and those who may benefit indirectly through my work (White & Epston, 1992).  This alternative perspective on my work with people inspires me to think about how I wish to leave a bit of me with clients.

The issue of mortality and immortality is of philosophical interest to me.  Reading Michael White and David Epston’s conversation on dying introduced relief from the pervasive notions of material existence (White & Epston, 1992).  In most Asian cultures, the notion of lineage is often emphasized as an important means to continue the family blood line and most people accept that procreation is a dignified purpose of life.  Therefore having children becomes valued as a personal legacy in society. But in the local LGBT (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgendered) community where adoption is not possible, there is little precedent knowledge about what else constitutes legacy for such individuals or couples.  A special project may help to create a new territory for such alternative knowledge to be shared within the community.  This project could be based on narrative practices to collect stories, skills, and knowledge of LGBT individuals and couples who construct their own special legacies.  I imagine such a project could also benefit some segments of the heterosexual community who are single or childless.

References
Dulwich Centre. (2008). Remembrance: Women and Grief Project. The International Journal of Narrative Therapy and Community Work(4), pp 60-71.

Russell, S., & Carey, M. (2002). Re-membering: responding to commonly asked questions. The International Journal of Narrative Therapy and Community Work(3), pp 45-62.

White, M., & Epston, D. (1992). 'A conversation about AIDS and dying' with Michael White & David Epston. In Experience, Contradiction, Narrative & Imagination: selected papers of David Epston & Michael White, 1989-1991. Adelaide, S. Aust.: Dulwich Centre Publications.

Externalising conversations & de-centered practice

I am doing a series of reflections as part of a post graduate course on Narrative Therapy.  Overall there will be about ten reflection papers on various concepts and practices that currently form and shape Narrative Therapy. 

The ethics of collaboration 
The ethics of control mentioned by Michael (White, 1997) stood out for me as it heightened my awareness of the dichotomies brought forth in the social service sector of Singapore.  One such dichotomy is between achievement and non-achievement of outcomes in the work that I do.  Such a dichotomy can exert pressures on how I work and sometimes I feel the “despair” of being caught in-between the voices of the client and the voices from a larger community who want to solve a problem that involves the client.

An example is when schools refer students and their families for counselling with me.  Often the desired outcome is one of problem solving to motivate students to return to regular schooling or to correct undesirable behaviours in school.  Teachers are often the ones to notice problems and make referrals but also often the ones who do not participate in subsequent meetings with the students or their families.  The result is that the outcomes desired by teachers and the outcomes desired by students and their families become distant or divergent.

When I read about the ethic of collaboration that goes towards building a “foundation of possibility”, I recall a recent meeting at a school with the student and his parent.  It was a rare occasion that the form teacher could join us.  Even though it was a short five minutes there was sufficient time to hear his expectations about outcomes, which were all about classroom behaviours. I could then clarify that my work ahead is more open-ended and not limited to the school context, and thus may not achieve such dramatic changes by the end of the counselling programme.  The teacher was a little surprised and realized that his expectations were being negotiated in the presence of the student and his parent.

I felt lighter after that dialogue in the family’s presence because there was a space for collaboration by organizing and inviting each party to speak.  After reading about the ethics of collaboration its significance is now clearer for me. 

Decentred practice 

The section on decentred practice described the micro-world of counselling and its potential to create monotony (White, 1997); I recall such monotony during one stage of counselling a client whom I had seen for over a year.  Because I had grown familiar with the client’s stories I gradually began to center my self in the therapy through the tradition of “self awareness”.  I began to wonder whether I could be better at the skills of counselling, whether I should see the client less often to prevent over-dependency, and so on.  Much of it became accountability for my actions rather than client’s.  There was indeed a sense of isolation.  A consultation with colleagues helped to dispel the feelings of isolation and helped validate my skills.  But still the focus was on me.

Now I have an acute awareness that various counselling traditions seem to contribute to the creation of this micro-world.  I am left with a dilemma about what to do with such traditions as “here and now” and “process versus content”.  These have been things that I valued from past knowledge and trainings. 

When I re-looked at the decentring practices, I found a way out of the dilemma.  The decentring practices were a way to harness the rich conversations between clients and others in their lives, including the therapist.  The conversations between client and therapist can be significant but I feel less burdened to make it so because it is only one alternative story in the counselling context. 

Externalising conversations

About a year ago I had this discussion with fellow practitioners on whether externalisation was an essential practice of narrative therapy.  We did not have a conclusion then.

A few things from the readings on externalising conversation stood out for me (Russell & Carey, 2002):

• “We sustain externalising conversations throughout the therapy process.”
• “That externalising is not a technique that we choose to use at certain times and then not at others.”
• “It can take some time, and much practice (both within and outside the therapy room) for the different language practices to become a seamless part of one’s work.” 

My understanding of externalisation had somehow become a technique.  In fact I realized my reference to it as “externalisation” implies it is finite and not a continuous process. I usually attempt to get the problems named by the client before I attempt externalizing conversations.  When the attempt fails, I tend to drop the externalising approach. I need to rethink about externalising conversations as a way of working rather than just being a “part of” my work.

Furthermore after reading the article on personalising AIDS and CARE, I am struck by how the conversations “only occur after extensive periods of consultation”  (Sliep & CARE Counsellors, 1996).  Sometimes I may be too eager to grab at the words that clients use and thus invite a sense of failure when externalising.  The CARE counsellors of Malawi consulted the community on the externalising project with respect to experiences of gender, AIDS, and sexuality.  For future externalising conversations to be useful I will want to consult clients in an extensive manner that allows externalising to occur collaboratively rather than be dependent on my own knowledges.

Externalising conversations often seem to conjure fun and drama, and yet difficult dilemmas can be raised.  I feel encouraged to inject such fun and drama into my own work yet I am not entirely comfortable.  Perhaps I need to trace the history of fun and drama in my own life and re-invite them to join in my work. 

References 
Russell, S., & Carey, M. (2002). Externalising - Commonly Asked Questions. The International Journal of Narrative Therapy and Community Work(2).

Sliep, Y., & CARE Counsellors. (1996). Conversations with AIDS and CARE. Dulwich Centre Journal(3), pp 141-156.

White, M. (1997). Part III: The Ethic of Collaboration and De-centered Practice. In Narratives of Therapists' Lives: Dulwich Centre Publications.

Dear MM ...

Taken from The Temasek Review, news of this also appeared in the Straits Times (ST, pg. A12, 23 Jan 2010):

Education Minister Dr Ng Eng Hen was asked a sensitive and difficult question during his dialogue session with NUS Society (NUSS) members.

Mr Dennis Tan, a 49 year old workplace safety and health trainer and NUSS member asked Dr Ng why MM Lee Kuan Yew is not stepping down.

Lee is currently the oldest member in the Singapore cabinet at 86 years of age. He was the first Prime Minister of Singapore from 1959 to 1990 before stepping down. He subsequently held the positions of Senior Minister and the Minister Mentor presently.

To his credit, Dr Ng gave a diplomatic reply without offending both Singaporeans and his political master:

“The question is, does MM add value to Singapore? I’m not talking about in history, I’m talking about now. That’s the question that should be asked, not whether he should retire or not. Singaporeans must decide. MM spots pitfalls, he tells you what to avoid. He pushed for F1, for the IRs. So you decide. At the end of the day, it’s the vote. If his constituents at Tanjong Pagar feel he’s not adding value, they are free to vote.”

Lee has attracted the ire of many Singaporeans by continuing to stay on in the Singapore government. Though he admited that he “is not doing much work except forecasting”, some still regard him as the “real power” behind the scenes.

He currently draws about an annual salary of $3 million dollars, more than 5 times that of U.S. President Barack Obama. The Singapore government is the only one in the world with a Minister Mentor, two senior ministers and two deputy prime ministers in addition to the Prime Minister himself.

Besides his portfolio in the cabinet, Lee is also the Chairman of Government Investment Corporation (GIC) which manages much of Singapore’s national reserves.

Lee’s son Lee Hsien Loong is currently the Prime Minister of Singapore. His daughter-in-law Ho Ching heads Temasek Holdings, Singapore’s other sovereign wealth fund.

One of his nephrew-in-law Wong Kan Seng is both the Deputy Prime Minister and Home Affairs Minister of Singapore.

The elder Lee has ruled Singapore with an iron fist since first assuming his position in 1959. He spent the later part of his political career traveling around the world to dispense his usual “pearls of wisdom” to other leaders on how to run their countries.

Lee has yet to reveal if he will contest in the next general election due by 2012. The last three elections had been walkovers for him. Perhaps the opposition can consider sending a young team to contest against him in the next election to see if voters still want him to “add value” to Singapore.

If I had the privilege to interview MM, I might be curious to ask the following questions:

Most people your age would have been contented to wind down and spend time away from work.  What are your personal life goals at this point of time?

If personal life goals are entwined with a duty to the nation, how do family and friends feel about this?

How would life be different for you if you stepped down from politics?

Life is unpredictable, what would you want to do for yourself before leaving this world?

Now, what drives my approach of questioning? Basically it's based on my counselling intuition that's informed by Mr. Lee's own writings, articles and recordings from his former political allies, and his public persona.  I could be really off the mark but my hypothesis is that "letting go" might be an issue here.  I'm referring to the theme of loss and grief familiar to counsellors.  Looking at Erikson's life stage development model as a reference, this is usually a stage for retrospection rather than productive social involvement.  

It's not meant to be a prescriptive model but it can be a useful map.  According to the model, the completion of each stage is important or otherwise the challenges of a previous stage can resurface later in life.   It may be argued that external factors left Mr. Lee with no choice but to stay active at work, and therefore "stuck" at an earlier stage.  Consider this, Mr. Lee could have chosen to walk away from it all if he felt he had already accomplished what he wanted in life, after all who could stop him?

Displacement

I've been feeling troubled by the recent news of Singaporeans living in tents pitched at Sembawang Park.  On one end of the public housing spectrum, The Pinnacle@Duxton stands as an epitome of high living standards, on the other end there are make shift camping tents occupied by those labeled as "displaced" by the vary same providers of public housing.  It's as if the term displacement absolves guilt from the actual consequence of having homeless people.

I went down to Sembawang Park to take a look for myself.  Altogether I counted 22 tents of various sizes though it was more difficult to count the actual persons living there and the number of family units.  It is a sizeable problem because almost all the approved tent pitching space has been taken up.  I've been staying in Sembawang for 39 years and this is certainly a sight new to me.  I wonder what it signifies about the societal changes in my life time. 

Dusk has come along with rain clouds and cold winds.  I feel displaced.