Love

For those who are in love with another, fell out of love, seeking love, or in a different state of love.

Notions of love and experiences of love are so fluid.
Some think love is like a flower but it can be a thorny bush.
Some think love is like a rainbow but it can be thundery storm.

So what exactly is love?

Holding on to the past is not love, doubting about the future is not love. Perhaps love is simply to live life fully.

I am of the nature to grow old.
There is no way to escape growing old.
I am of the nature to have ill health.
There is no way to escape ill health.
I am of the nature to die.
There is no way to escape death.
All that is dear to me and everyone I love are of the nature to change.
There is no way to escape being separated from them.
My actions are my only true belongings. 
I cannot escape the consequences of my actions. 
My actions are the ground upon which I stand.
-- The Buddha's Five Remembrances, by Thich Nhat Hanh
 

A matter of justice?

I was preparing to drive off after the lights turned green at a major road junction. As usual some drivers from the opposite direction sped past to make sure they could skip waiting for the next green light

A cyclist came after these cars, attempting to do the same. The car on my left moved forward and I heard a bang. Fortunately the cyclist escaped injury.

If there was injury or death, one could say it was mainly the cyclist's fault because he rashly ran the red light. This seemed obvious, or is it?

There is much to be said with many social constructs guiding my cognitive process. For example:

• The cyclist broke the law and thus was in the wrong, endangering others and himself in the process. 
• The cyclist was rash and did not consider how vulnerable he is against a moving car.
• This is a law abiding country which makes life efficient and safe for all.
• The driver should have given way since he was at no risk from danger to himself.
• The driver should have been more compassionate knowing the cyclist is at higher risk of injury and death.
• Laws make life easier for all but laws can be flexible to accomodate human mistakes.

How easily I ended up analysing and evaluating what happened and comparing the cyclist with the driver, and even with myself and society.

We should practice so that we can see, Muslims as Hindus and Hindus as Muslims. We should practice so that we can see Israelis as Palestinians and Palestinians as Israelis. We should practice until we can see that each person is us, that we are not separate from others. This will greatly reduce our suffering.

 -- Thich Nhat Hanh
 

To keep ourselves and others safe, here are two gathas for driving:

Before starting the car

I know where I am going.

The car and I are one,

if the car goes fast, I go fast.

This car is my legs.
It goes where I choose.
When I drive with awareness,
Everyone lives in safety.

Communion - A reflection on All Souls' and All Saints' Day

In most Christian versions of the Apostles' Creed, the "communion of saints" refers to the relationship between those present here, those who have died, and those yet to come. How does this relationship become real between the living, the dead, and the unborn? Is this something that requires a leap of faith?

Walking slowly in the moonlight through the rows of tea plants, I noticed my mother was still with me. She was the moonlight caressing me as she had done so often, very tenderly, very sweet... wonderful! 

Each time my feet touched the earth I knew my mother was there with me. I knew this body was not mine alone but a living continuation of my mother and father and my grandparents and great-grandparents. Of all my ancestors. These feet that I saw as "my" feet were actually "our" feet. Together my mother and I were leaving footprints in the damp soil.

-- Thich Nhat Hanh 

Perhaps what is needed is deep insight gained through experiencing our world as it is. 

不生不灭，无来无去，无同无异，无存在无不存在。 

-- 一行禅师 

Walking meditation

As I was walking yesterday, some spontaneous thoughts came to mind.

Still waters ...

Vapours rising ...

Clouds moving ...

Rain falling ...

It was a fusion of two sets of ideas:

1) Four element walking meditation
Earth - Feet feeling the ground. Soft, hard, rough, smooth
Fire - Lifting the feet. Lightness, ascent.
Air/wind - Movement
Water - Descent, heaviness, trickling down

2) Thay's (Thich Nhat Hanh) teachings

You are afraid that after we die we become Nothing. From Someone we become No one. From Being we pass into Non-being…

Now let us look deeply into the nature of a cloud.

In the morning when we look up in the sky, we see a cloud, and in the afternoon we look up and see that the sky is desperately empty.

And we conclude that the cloud has died. But it’s not possible for a cloud to die. A cloud can become rain or snow, or ice, but a cloud can never become Nothing. It is impossible for a cloud to die.

The cloud is just no longer in the form that you used to see, but it doesn’t mean that the cloud has disappeared. It is in another form now.

A cloud may manifest itself in the form of a cloud, but it may also like to manifest as rain or snow. And if you look deeply into your tea, you will see that your Cloud is in the cup!

Yesterday your Cloud was in a form of a cloud, but today it is in a form of Tea! Then when you drink your Tea mindfully and with wisdom, you will know that you are drinking your Cloud…

One form succeeds into another form.

So when you can’t see your Beloved Cloud in the sky anymore don’t cry…

Your Cloud has become the Rain falling into the ground joyfully and it is calling you: Darling… Darling… Can’t you see, I am here!.. Darling… Don’t cry, I am always here for you!…

Dazzlement and Mindfulness

A visit to the grand Resorts World Sentosa (RWS) and Universal Studios Singapore (USS) brought about a mix of thoughts and feelings. I wondered what I appreciated about these places and what brought discomfort.

They are beautiful places, showcasing the artistry and talent of many people across many cultures. There is much laughter, joy, and excitement in the air. It is a place to be dazzled.

And the discomfort sits on this point of dazzlement. Coincidentally, the origin of the word "dazzle" comes from "daze", which means to be stunned or overwhelmed. It is a place seemingly void of suffering with the senses overwhelmed with beautiful sights, wonderful scents, exotic foods, fancy goods, and exciting play. It is a place where mindfulness can be forgotten.

Leaving the place, it can bring lingering feelings of wanting more: another dish to taste, another ride to try, another photo to take, and so on. Fortunately, reality awakens us most of the time and brings us home to the present.

Fifth Mindfulness Training - Nourishment and Healing 

Aware of the suffering caused by unmindful consumption, I am committed to cultivating good health, both physical and mental, for myself, my family, and my society by practicing mindful eating, drinking, and consuming. I will practice looking deeply into my consumption of the Four Kinds of Nutriments, namely edible foods, sense impressions, volition, and consciousness.  I am determined not to gamble, or to use alcohol, drugs, or any other products which contain toxins, such as certain websites, electronic games, TV programs, films, magazines, books, and conversations.  I will practice coming back to the present moment to be in touch with the refreshing, healing and nourishing elements in me and around me, not letting regrets and sorrow drag me back into the past nor letting anxieties, fear or craving pull me out of the present moment.  I am determined not to try to cover up loneliness, anxiety or other suffering by losing myself in consumption.  I will contemplate interbeing and consume in a way that preserves peace, joy, and well-being in my body and consciousness and in the collective body and consciousness of my family, my society and the Earth. 

 

Interbeing: Christian - Buddhist

Jesus said to him, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.

If you know me, then you will also know my Father. From now on you do know him and have seen him.” 

-- John 14:6-7

 

Being a Christian, one of my major hurdles is the notion of exclusive salvation. Somehow there are many human traits projected onto the God of the Abrahamic religions. This to me seems to limit God as it contradicts the "infinity" of God which encompasses being eternal, omnipresent, omnipotent, and of infinite goodness. This limitation has also inadvertantly cast an invisible barrier on my own openness and spiritual growth.

I have long held a hope since teenage years for a deeper experience and understanding, that frees God from mere human dogma and notions. I would say this journey of discovery has reached an interesting juncture. 

And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate to be with you always, the Spirit of truth, which the world cannot accept, because it neither sees nor knows it. But you know it, because it remains with you, and will be in you.

-- John 14:16-17

 

With the energy of mindfulness, we can see deeply. With the Holy Spirit, we can see deeply. Mindfulness is the energy of the Buddha. The Holy Spirit is the energy of God. They both have the capacity to make us present, fully alive, deeply understanding, and loving. That is why in our daily life, we should live mindfully, we should live with the Holy Spirit so we can live every moment of our daily life deeply. If we do not live each moment deeply, there is no way we can touch the ultimate dimension, the dimension of the noumena.

-- "Going Home: Jesus and Buddha as Brothers" by Thich Nhat Hanh

To touch the ultimate dimension, to know God, this is possible through Jesus who tells us the Holy Spirit is already within us. Practicing mindfulness has helped unravel this buried treasure, by allowing me to let go the layers of notions accumulated through human history, the history of religions. It has become unnecessary to speak of God, indeed the name of God is "unspeakable".

Strangely, YHWH, the Hebrew proper name for God, is also known as the Breath of Life. Try pronouncing it purely without any vowels ... 

Breathing in, I know I am breathing in.
Breathing out, I know I am breathing out.

Breathing in, I see myself as a flower.
Breathing out, I feel fresh.

Breathing in, I see myself as a mountain
Breathing out, I feel solid.

Breathing in, I feel myself as still water.
Breathing out, I reflect things as they are.

Breathing in, I see myself as space.
Breathing out, I feel free.

Breathing in, I know that I am breathing in.
Breathing out, I know that I am breathing out.

As my in-breath grows deep,
My out breath grows slow.

Breathing in makes me calm.
Breathing out brings me ease.

With the in-breath, I smile,
With the out-breath I release.

Dwelling in the present moment,
I know this is a wonderful moment.

Feelings come and go, like clouds in a windy sky
Conscious breathing is my anchor. 

-- Basket of Plums: Songs in the Tradition of Thich Nhat Hanh

The question about seeking answers

Recently I met a person who asked the spouse: "Tell me why you married me?" Often I hear similar questions like "why do you love me?", "what do you like about me?", "what do you see in me?", "who am I to you?", and so on.

These questions are probably fine once in a while but when one hears it often then perhaps doubt has arisen. Sometimes the doubt about an other has a basis and the spouse takes courage to bring it up for clarification. At other times, it can arise from the concept of "self" in terms of: self-doubt, lack of self-confidence, self-loathe, and so on. Such types of doubt require more than just answers from the spouse or a loved one.

So when someone asks "why do you love me?", it might be worthwhile to address the significance of the answer to that "self" who asked: How does it matter to your self in seeking that answer?